


Dead Man Walking

by batgirl856



Series: Never Fell Out of Love With You [2]
Category: Batgirl (Comics), Batman Eternal (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Angst, Arguing, F/M, Insecure Jason Todd, Post-Break Up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:26:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25816513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/batgirl856/pseuds/batgirl856
Summary: Jason reflects on his relationship with Barbara. Things could have–should have gone better. If he wasn't so damn insecure.Song: Youngblood by 5SOS
Relationships: Barbara Gordon/Jason Todd
Series: Never Fell Out of Love With You [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1873120
Comments: 9
Kudos: 26





	Dead Man Walking

**Author's Note:**

> So I did a thing. Shhh. Enjoy!
> 
> P.S I love the idea of Jason calling Barbara 'love' so I had to include that!

**Remember the words you told me, love me til the day I die**

_The movie was long over, as Barbara shifted, curling into Jason's side. Jason turned, kissed her on the forehead, and slowly drifted off to sleep, holding her tight._

Jason thought of the memory fondly, before pushing it away. They were over, she made sure he understood that.

He rolled over, looking at the clock. It read 6:28 AM. Too early for him to be thinking about anything, yet he still thought about how he missed her warmth beside him in the morning hours. How he missed holding her. How he missed her smile, her laugh.

**Surrender my everything 'cause you made me believe you're mine**

_"Hey, Jay, I understand that it may be too hard to talk about some things, but you can't keep yourself closed off forever if...if this relationship is going to work." Barbara said, wrapping her arms around his neck. "You know I'm here for you, right?"_

_"I know, Barbie, and I think I'm ready to let you in." Jason replied, leaning in to kiss her ever so softly._

Jason sat up, scrubbing at his eyes, as if to erase the memories of her. Of them. They were never getting back together. With the way she looked at him...they were never getting back together. Ever. Just last week at the family dinner...

**Yeah, you used to call me baby, now you calling me by name**

_Hey, Barbara..." It was the first time they'd seen each other since the break up._

_"Jason." She acknowledged him, nodding curtly before walking away. But her eyes. The look in her eyes said it all._

God, he really fucked up. She hated him. She hated him and it was his own damn fault, his own damn insecurities. How could he fail to trust her? His partner, his love, his _life_? 

_**Takes one to know one, yeah, you beat me at my own damn game** _

_Yeah, Jason was insecure. Why would a wonderful girl with a mischievous heart of gold like Barbara Gordon be with him of all people? Especially since for the longest time, she was convinced she was in love with the perfect child, the golden boy? Why would she be with the screw up of the family?_

_So he tried to trick her. Tried to get her to admit that she was still in love with Dick Grayson. Well, he should have known better than to try and pull a fast one on her. She twisted his mind around, and tricked him into admitting his insecurities. He'd never seen her so mad before._

_"I had to be sure you weren't still in love with him!"_

_"Jason, do you really think I would be with you if I was still caught up on Dick?" she questioned with venom in her voice._

_"Yeah, like if you were using me to make him jealous or..." he fumbled._

_"You really think I would be that shallow?" Tears were streaming down her face._

_"I had to be sure...I–I've been hurt before..."_

_"Then you really don't know me at all," she turned, sadly shaking her head._

Why hadn't he trusted her? He let his insecurities get the best of him, again. Like on the bridge. Dammit. 

**You push and you push and I'm pulling away, pulling away from you**

_Jason tried calling, and texting, hell–he even sent her an email, but it soon became evident that she didn't want to talk. Or at least, talk to him._

_He tried going to her house. Either she was never home, or, she straight up just didn't want to answer the door. He hadn't seen her face to face in weeks, until he caught sight of that beautiful red hair and that black and yellow cape._

_He chased after her, not knowing what to say, or what to do, just that he needed to fix his mistake. After a few rooftops, she dropped out of sight. He jumped down into the alley, looking for where she might have gone._

_"What do you want, Hood?" Jason spun around to face her, startled at how she'd been able to sneak up on him. He removed his helmet, preparing what he was going to say in his mind._

_"I–I wanted to talk to you?" He cringed at how it came as a question. "To say sorry?"_

_"Wow, that sounds sooo genuine," she muttered sarcastically._

_"Look, Batgirl, I wanted to say sorry, okay? I'm sorry." He stepped towards her. She took a step back. "I, uh, should have trusted you. I mean, why would you even want to be with Grayson? He like, left you in your time of need." The look on her face went from surprised to shocked, to anger._

_"My time of need?" she hissed. "Neither of you have a leg to stand on, because where were you, huh? Off playing the bad guy, learning how to kill! Instead of coming home to us!"_

_"Well, you weren't there for me either. Where were you when the Joker was bashing my organs in with a crowbar?" She looked at him shocked. "Yeah, I thought so. You know, dying hurts. More than words can explain." His voice shook with anger. "Maybe if you had died–" Jason tried to stop himself but it was too late._

**Youngblood, say you want me, say you want me, out of your life**

_"You know what? Don't talk to me. Stop calling, stop messaging, forget where I live. I'm sick if you. I'm sick of this. We're done." she snapped._

_"Barbie, my love, you know I didn't mean it!" Jason pleaded. "Barbara!" It was too late. She was already gone._

**And I'm just a dead man walking tonight**


End file.
